Think on it.

Do you ever just have to stop and pause sometimes? Well I’m asking you to just stop. Just pause and think before you have a thought. Pause before judging. Pause before becoming jealous. Pause before negative self talk. Pause and THINK: T- is it true? H-is it helpful? I-is it inspiring? N-is it necessary? K-is it kind?

{I am her} or {I was her} is threaded throughout just so you know I’m not calling anyone out or saying that these things are only how I see others because I , too have been there. You are NOT alone. I feel you, girl.

Stop saying things like “You’re not a mom, you don’t understand.” Or stop saying things like “You don’t know what it’s like to have anxiety”. I’m 99.9% sure you’re NOT the only person who feels things the way you do. Since when did society become a contest of who’s more busy, who’s more supermom or perfect housewife, who’s more successful at their career, or who’s got more issues? “Wonder Woman” becomes a woman who wonders why and how I do it all? Why do we compare? Why do we judge? So what if you’re a stay-at- home mom (thats great you can enjoy more time with your babies, a blessing!) and your bestie is a working mom who takes her kids to daycare, or better yet what if she doesn’t have kids yet? Doesn’t mean you or her either one is any less of a mom because of parenting choices. Breastfed or formula, homemade puree baby food or store bought: either way mama you are feeding your growing little human. You are a mama and that in itself is a gift. And the friend or family member isn’t any less of a woman just because she is not yet a mother who brought life into this world. What if she isn’t ready yet? {I am her} What if she and her husband want to grow as a couple in their marriage before bringing tiny humans into the picture? {I am her}What if sadly she struggles with infertility? {Many of my friends face this} What if you’re a self made, work from home, ground- up, start-up business entrepreneur rather than your friend who is “stuck” in a 9-5 job where she desperately wants to flourish and grow but feels trapped? If you are an entrepreneur, girl own it! I’m proud of you! Embrace the privilege and insight God has gifted you with, enjoy the process! If you’re in a job or career where you want to change or feel stuck, maybe God has you there for a season (however long that season maybe months, years, or decades) to grow you and prepare for every season, again embrace the process! Your diligence, hard work and perserverance don’t go unnoticed. I’m proud of you too! Don’t spend each day waiting for the next big change, step or life event.{I was her} Or here’s another; a woman who’s career choice others may consider difficult, hard, stressful and may not understand why she does it, but she absolutely loves it even if the pay isn’t as much, but the rewards are far greater? {I am her} (Example: childcare teachers like myself, or first responders-a volunteer firefighter like my husband). What about the single friend who’s the last one left of the squad to find someone? The divorced friend? The single parent friend? What about her, she has a picturesque perfect Better Homes & Garden style home that is perfectly decorated, organized and CLEAN. What if she struggles OCD or compulsive cleaning and feels like a failure because things are a mess, maybe she feels like if she fixes things and tidyed up here and there that she’s got it somewhat together and things in her control even if it’s temporary. {I am her} The one who seems to always smile and be a ray of sunshine to everyone but hurts inside. {I was her} The one who has anxiety attacks from things she can’t control or irrational fears and someone just says “Calm down and stop freaking out”, “You’re overreacting it’s not that serious”. People struggle secretly with different things like this. {I was her} Anxiety is a real thing, not made up. It comes in different forms from irrational fears and phobias, to feeling like you have no control over a situation, or fear of missing out (fomo as people call it) or feeling left out or less than? {I am her}

Do you see a pattern here? These things are thoughts that we create in our own minds and they hold us prisoner and captive. Scripture says we are to take every thought captive, and hold it to the light of truth to God’s Word! Philippians 4:8 states “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable-if anything is excellent or praiseworthy-think about such things.
(NIV) If it isn’t pleasing or pleasant, encouraging or edifying; toss it out of your mind like yesterday’s trash! Negative thoughts should not hold us captive!

I ask all these questions and bring out all these traits and flaws because of judgement and insecurity. What if we stop judging the other mom, the other wife, the other teacher or co-worker, the other entrepreneur, the other sister, the other friend about how they do things differently than you? Just because someone has a different method or idea than you doesn’t mean their thought process is wrong: its just different (and thats okay!) The old saying “Don’t judge someone because they sin differently than you” is correct. Have you ever gotten mad at someone and they didn’t even know it? Sometimes we make up the “mean girl” syndrome in our own minds thinking “oh well she’s judging me”, or “I don’t agree with her on things so we must not be friends” or “she didn’t include me, I felt left out” and the thoughts of what we felt when we misheard someone or how we perceived and received what they said (communication is 90% of how you say it rather what you say; delivery is everything). I would get upset with friends or family when I feel they don’t support me in the little things, not invite me, or feel like they secretly judge me, or just don’t have time for or appreciate me. God had been teaching me and showing me grace in these areas. We may think people are mad at us, or we find a reason to be mad at them, or we think someone is judging us or we find some reason to judge them. Jealousy leads to judgement. Which leads to a root of bitterness. Once again, creating a prison of our own thoughts! Things that may not even be realistic or in all actuality even true! The lies we believe come from the enemy, to try to make us mad at our other brothers and sisters in Christ. We must not let our stereotypes, lifestyles, thoughts, opinions or anything define us or make us define others. We are NOT perfect beings. There is no perfect husband or wife, perfect mom and dad, or perfect kids. We are all learning as we go. No one, has it all together. If we stop pretending as if we do and just talk with others about their same struggles we can muddle through the beautiful mess together. The struggle is real, but so is Jesus. We must be REAL and raw and authentic, listen without judgement or even listen without the sake of responding, sometimes people need to be heard, not always advised or fixed. (Look up in Scripture about Job’s friends there’s alot to learn from them both good and bad). You must take this seriously, not lightly…when someone comes to you in confidence and confidentially keep it that way. Your worth or mine, is not defined but how you judge people but how you treat people, or by what you do but who you are. Judge not lest you be judged. Affirm someone by not assuming you know their story. Love one another, bear one another’s burdens. Chances are someone else really does know how it feels. Joy over judgement. Be intentional, not insecure. Be kind, not catty.

Eve: The Nature of Womankind & Life-Giving Mother [Women of the Word Series: 1]

Women of the Word Series: 1

Introduction:

Let’s go back to the beginning, where did we come from? Where did as we as WOMEN come from? We see in the world and society today, women standing up everywhere raising their voices for something they believe in. Women, who are we? What do we stand for? But more importantly, WHO do you belong to? I don’t care what political party, agenda, belief of left or right, I just want women everywhere regardless of their background to know that before anything or anyone else YOU ARE A DAUGHTER OF THE KING! That’s why we are going back to basics. The origin of humanity is simple, to say the least: mankind (Adam) came from dust, womankind (Eve) came from his rib. But yet, as simple as it sounds it is also complex and intricate in detail. The human body is made up of cells, fibers, tendons, ligaments, bones, muscles, tissues, organs, blood, and organs. We can taste, smell, see, hear, touch and feel. Each part of the body functions separately but works together as one. We were created to move, breathe, walk and talk; but so much more we were created to live, think, have emotions and feelings, to love, to be all that He made us to be, and to have a relationship with Him. Humans are unlike any other creation of God’s; we are His masterpieces. Let’s go back to Eden…

Perspective:

{Portion told from Adam’s perspective} “The moment I felt the breath of Life, come into my lungs I felt such a powerful awakening purpose. I was dust and dirt. Then suddenly every fiber in my being came to life by the One who created me. I knew to think, to feel, and I knew Him instantly. He gave me the most beautiful home to live and take care of. All of the plants and animals, I was given to name and take stewardship of. But yet, although I knew and loved my Creator; something was missing. He knew and I knew. I remember Him saying *“It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” Then all I remember is feeling at peace, and falling into a deep sleep. When I woke up, I couldn’t believe what a beautiful gift I’d been blessed with…” She was beautiful beyond words, **”This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.” I called her by name, ***Eve…the mother of all living. And my Eve; she was made for me and she was and is the woman of my dreams… (*Gen. 2:18, **Gen. 2:23, ***Gen. 3:20)

So let’s take a moment to pretend we are taking our very first breath as the first woman created: “Mrs. Eve”.

Her Story:

{Told from Eve’s perspective} “I was crafted and molded from him, my beloved. From his bone, I became flesh. Not from his head to be above him or superior, not from his heel to be walked over or inferior, but right by his side-a rib, under his loving, strong arms to be protected and held, but close to his heart to be loved. We are equal; we are fully made and sculpted by our Creator. I felt the Giver, the breath from Him bring an invigorating, life-giving passion and purpose. It was a surreal feeling, because immediately I knew who I was because He created me, and I had a purpose. Every cell and fiber in my being came to life by one single breath from God; the same way my husband , my Adam was made. We were and are crafted to be like Him, in His image. I couldn’t believe my eyes when I looked at the beauty of my home, Eden was literally paradise. Made just for me and my beloved husband to live, to grow, and raise our family one day…but even more beautiful was the idea that we could walk and talk with our Creator. I was made to be a helpmate and companion of my husband; he is the head of our home, the leader and keeper of my heart. I am his and he is mine. I heard Adam’s love in his voice when he said, *”This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.”* He was talking about me, the love of his life.

One day, I was just strolling through the garden admiring the beauty that God created; Adam was strolling not too far behind. Then, along came slithering a snake through the grass and up the tree that I was standing by; the most beautiful tree in the garden. This tree wasn’t just any tree; it was the Tree of Life…the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil. God said to never eat of this tree, or Adam and I would die. Die? The fruit of this tree was not poisonous, it was forbidden. If we ate from it, we would know the difference between good and evil? I know what is good; everything around me in this beautiful place was good! It was beautiful, God made it! But what is evil? I’d never heard of or experienced, let alone seen such a thing. Could evil be that bad? Will it hurt me and my husband? Then this snake started talking to me, saying some interesting things, “Did God really tell you that you couldn’t eat from this tree?” I thought about it: It was a command, it was dangerous. But then, that sneaky serpent said “You would know everything and be like God.” Well, what was I missing? If we were made in God’s image, are we supposed to be like Him? I’m not sure that’s what God wants, but my curiosity got the best of me I tried the fruit from the tree. Immediately I saw everything differently, I was naked. I was vulnerable. I was confused. What just happened? Did I do something wrong? Something didn’t feel right. Everything didn’t seem quite as beautiful as before, it was tainted. Adam then ate of the fruit to see what was happening. Immediately he felt the same way I did. He was naked too. We were both confused and vulnerable. We went to make clothes from leaves. God saw that we were confused and trying to cover our shame. He knew what happened. The most cunning creature of all had found the upper hand. I was so ashamed. I was scared. I now knew what evil was, I met it face to face that day….

Her Hope:

Adam and Eve were created from the dust of the earth, by the hand of God. They lived in pure paradise, full of laughter and filled with light and joy. They were with their Creator. No discontent, no dysfunction, no discord or corruption. No shadows or fear. However, that joy was sharply diminished. Order gave way to chaos. Harmony gave way to discord. Craving and yearning to know more, created a hunger pang of deep despair and misery that could never be satisfied. Sin drove a wedge in the relationship between God and humankind. Sin planted seeds of confusion. Sin had bitten a piece of their mind and heart, just as they bit into the forbidden fruit.

Despair and hope are total opposites, they can’t really coexist much like peace and fear. But out of one springs forth the other…hope springs from despair. Her sorrow was deep. Her guilt was deeper. God knew exactly what happened and whom was to blame. Revenge belongs to the Lord. Scripture says in Romans 6:23 “For the wages of sin is death but the free gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Sin came with a high price: death. But life is still full of hope hinged on a specific and prophetic promise found in Genesis 3:15, “I will put enmity between you and the woman, and between your offspring and her offspring ; He shall bruise your head, and you shall bruise His heel.” Let’s expand on the two surrounding verses 14 & 16. To the serpent, God said “Because you have done this, cursed are you above all livestock and above all beasts of the field; on your belly you shall go, and dust you shall eat all the days of your life.” (v.14) and to Eve, the woman He said “I will surely multiply your pain in childbearing; in pain you shall bring forth children. Your desire shall be for your husband, and He shall rule over you.” Eve’s decision affected others besides herself. (Thanks Eve for mother nature’s visit and childbirth pain!) Any woman who is a mother, you know that childbirth is the most painful thing you will endure. But, out of pain comes the beauty of new birth. Adam wasn’t left out either, God said to him “Because you have listened to the voice of your wife and have eaten of the tree of which I commanded you, You shall not eat of it, cursed is the ground because of you; in pain you shall eat of it all the days of your life; thorns and thistles it shall bring forth for you; and you shall eat the plants of the field. By the sweat of your face you shall eat bread till you return to the ground, for out of it you were taken; for you are dust, and to dust you shall return.” Each character in this story in history were impacted, therefore impacting their children and the rest of us who long came after. Her hope came from Genesis 3:15 that one day the offspring of her children’s children-her ancestry would defeat this cunning serpent once and for all. Her life did go on. God still used her and her family.

Her Prayer:

Eve later on experienced the pain of childbirth and joy of motherhood. They had two sons Cain and Abel. Sadly, we know how the pain of sin affected their family…jealously crept in just like the serpent had before; Cain murdered his brother Abel. I can’t imagine a mother’s heartbreak and grief. Later on her and Adam had Seth, and many other sons and daughters as scripture says. Eve was called the mother of all living. She was the first of many. She birthed humanity into flesh and bone. She was the first woman, therefore she experienced every emotion we face as women. She felt beautiful and alive, full of joy and awestruck wonder. She felt curiosity which led to the life-altering decision, then shame and guilt quickly followed. She was the one who cried the first tears, and yet God still collected them in a bottle, wiped her cheek and called her His own. She felt sorrow, after being deceived. She experienced self-doubt and humiliation. She experienced repentance and forgiveness. She was able to laugh and smile, love life again with her husband. She experienced grief, motherhood struggles, worry, and being a “boy mom”. She experienced life. I imagine she told Adam how she felt from time to time. I imagined she prayed to God through all of her emotions, through laughter and tears. A woman who loved her husband and children. She took pride in exactly who God created her to be A woman who made a mistake but was and is still God’s beloved daughter. Her purpose was not overshadowed by that huge world-changing decision although it tells her story, it’s not her whole life.

Prayer & Reflection

Lord, my Father and Creator. The One who gave me life. Thank You for bringing into the world You created, for handcrafting my body, heart, mind and soul just as You did Eve. Thank for forgiveness and not allowing my mistakes and sins, to define my whole life and write my entire story and purpose because You already created my purpose. Thank You for grace and mercy. In the face of many emotions we face as women, God You created us to think, know, and feel every emotion with every fiber of our being. As women, You created us emotional by nature. We feel, and love and get upset, and cry, and sometimes doubt ourselves, and yet we nurture and care and help husbands and raise children to love You. Help us, help me Daddy to know that above all else I am Your daughter. Amen.

Questions:

1. Imagine if you were Eve, opening your eyes for the first time, drawing your first breath. The first thing you saw was your Creator and then the one who you were created for, your husband? Look around at the beautiful place you get to call home, Eden. What words and emotions would you use to describe everything?

2. The serpent told Eve, God just doesn’t want you to know everything, He’s keeping good things from you and Adam. Just eat the fruit and find out what you’re missing. What lies about yourself or about God’s truth has Satan led you to believe in your life?

3. Read Genesis 1:26-28 along Genesis 2:18-24. We are ALL made in His image, man and woman. Man was made in His image and woman made after man’s image. We are equal. But woman was created to be a helpmate and companion to man. Adam said she is bone of my bone and flesh of flesh. Basically, she’s mine and I’m hers…and together we’re His! This passage affects the basis on how each human being treats another (in his image), and the basis and foundation of marriage. How do these verses compare to our society and world today? Has society forgotten those values?

4. Think about the last paragraph “Her Prayer” talking about emotions and being a woman, as well as how Eve’s life-altering decision affected but did not define her life and purpose. How’s can you apply that to your own life?

I encourage you ladies to not only read this, but follow along in your Bible, reflect on the questions, comment and share! I would love for this to be an interactive series!

-With love, Heather